Could Do Without
by TokyoJunk
Summary: He was an unconventional prince and she was a maiden who hardly needed saving. Lady/Vergil Fairytale AU.
1. Chapter 1

**Note:** I've been working on this story for awhile now. This is the product of my time roleplaying Lady on LJ at GargleBlasted (fantastic rp game! good times!). I usually play Lady from DMC4 so when she met a much younger Vergil, it was hilarity at first sight. This story is dedicated to my wonderful time there. So to warn, there will probably be some other characters making an appearance here and there from other fandoms. (I will tell you who they are at the end of the chapter). But yeah, this story is meant to be fun and not to be taken seriously, like, at all! So enjoy!

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**01.**

Vergil stopped walking, his hand reaching for the hilt of his katana, gloved fingers wrapping around its grip. He thought he sensed someone or _something_, but nothing came as his ears and nose picked up nothing. The half demon prince continued his walk down the beaten path, unaware of the mismatched blue and red eyes that glowed in the distance. He continued on, thinking only of his quest. Vergil wasn't your average prince. He didn't care about long harrowing journeys to prove his self-worth, nor did he care about rescuing beautiful princesses from mortal peril. Vergil had better things to do: like finding his father's powerful sword and opening the gates of hell.

Vergil was on a mission to unleash total chaos and destruction™ all across the land. But being that he was a product of his father, a demon known as the legendary dark knight, Sparda, and a human woman, Vergil could only rise to half of his true potential. As a half demon, he was unable to open the gates of hell, no matter how hard he tried.

"Open, damn you!" Vergil growled as he tried to unlock the door...with his fists. He pounded so hard his fists felt raw.

The door merely smirked at the half demon.

"Not without a password!" it chimed. But really it was more complicated than that, but the door was in the middle of reading this ridiculous novel about sparkling vampires and it didn't have the time to explain to the little halfling the true way of opening it. It winced once it felt another punch.

"Stop punching me you're chipping the paint!" it yelled, before flicking Vergil away like a little ant.

To it was, to say the least, an agonizing defeat.

But Vergil knew he could do it. He knew he could get the gates open, find the Sword of Sparda and unleash pure chaos and destruction™.

He just needed to get more power.

His younger brother, Dante, was against the idea.

"Your idea sucks."

"Your opinion is of no use to me," Vergil replied coolly.

Though they were identical twin brothers, Dante somehow managed to look older than Vergil. Not that this mattered or bothered Vergil because he was the oldest by _five_ minutes and anyone who said otherwise could go pleasantly die in a fire.

"It's going to blow up in your face." Dante kicked his feet off the floor and placed them on the old wooden desk, leaning back in his chair with his arms behind his head. "And anyway, what makes you think I won't chase you down to stop you?"

Vergil smirked, thinking how delusional his _younger_ brother was.

"You, stop me? May I remind you _little_ brother," Vergil always had to make sure to remind Dante who the real big brother was since Dante seemed to forget what with looking all old and stuff. Not that Dante looking older _bothered _Vergil or anything.

"There is no comparison when it comes to you and I. I will go on to achieve my goals and if you try to stop me, you'll just be left with the bitter reminder that my skills are superior to yours while you wallow in self-pity after your inevitable defeat. I am a true son of Sparda and with great power I will achieve full demonhood and open the gates of hell to unleash—"

Dante snored, as was his body's defense mechanism against boring monologues.

Vergil scoffed and kicked the chair out from under his brother.

So Vergil continued to walk along the beaten path on his quest to gain more power to open the gates of hell in order to unleash pure chaos and destruction™ when he happened upon a small farming town. The people there looked happy, which only made Vergil scowl. _Weaklings_, he thought. Humans were such pathetic creatures, bound by mortality, emotions—his stomach growled.

Hunger.

He spotted a local tavern and decided that he might as well get something to eat. After all, dark princes who were hell-bent on unleashing pure chaos and destruction™ needed to keep their strength up.

Once inside, he ordered something to drink while he glanced at the menu. No one seemed to pay Vergil any mind which suited him just fine since the last thing he needed was some human peasant wanting to start conversation.

"Hello!" a chirpy voice called to him from behind.

Vergil closed his eyes and wished he were someplace else.

"You're not from around here and you look like you don't want to be bothered, would you like to talk?" Vergil detected a foreign accent in the boy's voice and when he opened his eyes he found the boy sitting next to him with a wide smile. The boy didn't look any older than ten. His white hair fell into his gray eyes and Vergil noticed a red scar going down the left side of his face.

"My name is—" the boy was immediately shoved out the way by a redheaded man wearing priest garments.

"Oi, a cold one!" the man said, before getting out his pipe and preparing it for a smoke.

The boy pouted as the priest blew smoke in his face. "I said move! Your hideous face only makes me want to punch it more."

Vergil raised an eyebrow, but did not get involved. As long as the child was not near him to start arbitrary conversation then it was fine. He could now at least pick from the menu in peace—

"You an albino?"

Vergil looked up and scowled at the redhead with the long mane of hair.

"Cuz you look like one. Bet you don't tan either. Pasty white skin of yours...disgusting," the man said looking at Vergil up and down while he puffed on his pipe.

"Excuse me?" Vergil asked, his voice thick and menacing.

But the priest didn't seem to care at how threatening Vergil looked because he didn't look impressed.

"So what's an albino like you doing in a crap town like this?"

"I hardly see how that's any of your business and for that matter I could ask you the same, priest."

"I'm here to bring salvation and the fear of God into these simple-minded people."

"That's none of my concern," Vergil said, clipped. "So leave me be."

He went back to his menu, but for some reason he couldn't concentrate on it. Not with his eyebrow twitching in annoyance as he felt the man's eyes on him. He could picture his amused grinned and it only made his grip on the menu tighten to the point of breaking it.

"From the clothes you're wearing you seem to come from money. You a prince?"

"My economic standing is of no business to you," he replied, choosing not to face him.

There was silence as the man puffed on his pipe. The smoke smelled sweet, sickly sweet, which made Vergil want to gag. Could humans be anymore disgusting?

"I bet you're loaded," the priest said.

Vergil reached for Yamato's handle. He could silence this idiot once and for all.

"Master!" the boy came back, though Vergil didn't recall him ever leaving.

"I talked to some patrons around here and they said we're close. The wizard resides in the north, through the thorny forest and up the foggy mountain. They say his tower resides there."

"Good. I hear this douchebag is ridiculously powerful."

At the word powerful, Vergil visibly straightened.

"It'll be good to knock him down a peg or too. Get your stuff and let's go," the priest said, downing his drink in one gulp as he rose.

"How powerful is he?" Vergil found himself asking.

The priest stopped smoothing out his garments and looked at Vergil. "Ridiculously powerful, like, can obliterate half the kingdom powerful," he replied, with a raised eyebrow.

Vergil almost smirked at the prospect of such a powerful opponent. If he were to defeat this powerful wizard and absorb his power then he might be powerful enough to open the gates of hell.

"That powerful?"

The priest nodded. "No one, human or demon, is a match for him. So I'm going to go throw this idiot at him and hope for the best," the redhead said pointing to the boy, who smiled.

"I'm training!" the white-haired youth chirped.

Vergil ignored him.

"What's the wizard's name?"

The priest rubbed his chin as he thought.

"I think his name is Acorn."

"It's Arkham, Master," the boy corrected.

"Yeah, that's it."

"And he's powerful?" Vergil asked, practically salivating in glee. Only Vergil didn't do glee, so we'll just say he looked evilly pleased.

"Yes, my god, what are you? Slow? The guy's pretty powerful and probably rich as hell. It's a wonder why he lives in that crappy tower. Could probably make himself a castle with a bitching moat."

Vergil stood up, having heard enough.

"You're going after him?" the priest asked, an amused smirk on his lips. "There's also a pretty hot maiden trapped in the tower. Heard she got a rack that needs milking, if ya catch my drift."

Vergil had no idea what he was talking about. He had better things to do than talk about some useless princess and her equally more useless milk utters.

"I have no interest in this maiden."

The priest snorted. "What are you gay?"

"Women are of no use to me," he replied.

"So... you're flaming?"

Vergil scowled, not understanding his question.

"What does being on fire have anything to do with—"

"It's okay, I don't mind the gays, means more women for me."

Enough was enough. This obnoxious man reminded Vergil of his _younger_ brother, who was _five_ minutes younger than Vergil despite being taller and older looking. He placed a hand on Yamato's grip, unsheathing it a bit as a warning.

"Oh put that thing away, what are you a peacock? No one gives a shit how cool you look."

Vergil frowned. People were totally looking because he _was_ _cool_.

"Listen kid," the priest puffed on his pipe. "This wizard, he's tricky. He'll play mind games with you. There's a reason he's as powerful as he is ugly. Try not to get your ass handed back at you," he said, taking a seat again and waving a hand for another drink. If someone else was going to take on the wizard, why bother? He was sure he could find a strong ferocious bear for his pupil to fight.

"You underestimate me, priest," Vergil grinned. "I fully intend on winning. As a son of the legendary dark knight, I have the power to overcome any obstacle that belittles normal humans. Once I defeat Arkham and absorb his power, I'll be able to open the demon gates and get the Sword of Sparda that belongs to me by birth right. I will unleash complete and utter chaos onto the kingdom and I will rule as both God and King when the time of -"

The priest snored, as was his body's defense mechanism against incredibly boring monologues.

Vergil growled and kicked the chair out from under the priest before leaving.

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**Note:** The priest and his lovely apprentice are Cross Marian and Allen Walker from DGrayman.


	2. Chapter 2

Note: I'm glad it's at least enjoyable. Again, not a serious story. Just silly and made for fun. Also, Vergil is hilarious to write, the poor dork.

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2.

The journey to the tower was rather annoying. Not only was his long blue coat in danger of being ripped in the thorny forest, but the tower itself seemed to have gone out of its way in appearing farther and farther away the closer Vergil got. Maybe it was his imagination or the lack of oxygen at such a high altitude as he scaled the mountain, but something was off about the tower. For one, the door wasn't guarded, nor was it locked. In fact, the door seemed to open once at Vergil's presence.

Once inside, he saw the tower hadn't seen much in terms of visitors, unless you counted those skeletons chained against the walls, but Vergil didn't because he was sure those skeletons had it coming. Who in their right mind would wear fur boots with Viking hats? Hideous. They deserved to die for their ridiculous tacky fashion.

He stopped, a hand on Yamato's grip and moving so fast as to trick the human eye, the demon that was preparing to attack him from behind fell to the ground in half. Vergil sheathed his sword as the demon's blood rained down around him and soon the young prince had company. This didn't bother him as it only made him smirk. He rushed forth, his katana sending out a thin slash of light as he effortlessly cut through his enemies, their bodies falling as their blood gushed out in violent bursts. More demons arrived and Vergil executed them just as quickly, slashing with little effort. It wasn't until the floor mirrored a sea of blood did they stop coming and Vergil stood still, sheathing his katana with a swift click.

He waited until the last demon dissolved to sand and dust to comb his hair back since his hair needed to be up and perfectly coiffed always as to distinguish him from his identical younger brother (by five minutes) who coincidentally looked older than him.

Vergil scowled.

Damn you Dante.

He let the image of his brother slide out of his mind when he came into the library.

Unlike the room downstairs, the library was a well lit large room, with stone bookcases built into the floor that towered up towards the ceiling. The young prince walked along the hallway when a sound from behind stopped him in his tracks. He turned and saw a book on the ground—a purple leather bound—and went to pick it up.

It was about his father, the Legendary Dark Knight and his tale of how he became the greatest warrior of all time. In the war between the demons and the humans, his father betrayed his demon brothers and defended the humans. With his great power he managed to defeat Mundus, the king of the underworld, and seal the gates that united both worlds. He did this at a sacrifice however as he gave up his most powerful weapon, the Sword of Sparda. He gave the sword up and sealed the gates while leaving everything he knew behind. He settled in the human realm where he met and fell in love with a human woman and fathered twin sons. That was the story recorded in books, the story that became legend.

Little did everyone know was that story was far from the truth and the only reason the _real_ story wasn't well known was because the humans old enough to really remember the ancient tale were already dead. In reality, there was no war between the demons and the humans, but a property dispute between a demon and a human farmer. As usual, the neighbors were at each other's throats about who owned what.

"The tree is mine!" the demon said, looking at the tree in his yard.

"Fine keep your tree, but the apples are mine," said the human, which was true since the tree, despite being in the demon's yard, leaned over towards the human's yard where the apples fell. The demon did not like this because despite being a demon, he was quite fond of apples hence the apple tree in his yard.

Sparda became involved in all of this somehow because he didn't have anything else better to do than swing a big sword around as though he was compensating for something and tried being the mediator. What ended up happening, after a series of rock-paper-scissors games gone wrong, was a full-blown fight. The demon got his friends who got their friends and so on and so forth and the human, not wanting to be outnumbered, did the same.

Sparda was in the middle, eating apples and keeping score.

It was a brutal fight with casualties on both sides and Sparda decided that enough was enough (that and he ran out of apples) and used his huge sword to end it all. He obliterated both sides and half the countryside. When he was done, he had a lot of explaining to do to the traumatized country folk who hadn't a clue about what was going on or why this stranger was dancing around bloody corpses singing about apples. Thankfully, Sparda, being the charming and handsome fellow he was, made up the story about the war and how he was their savior. They instantly believed him and how could they not? He was handsome, a stranger with a blood covered sword with crazy powers, and he had promised them peace and harmony as long as they let him keep the apple tree.

In the end, he made a big show on how much of a sacrifice he'd made to them, going as far as to seal his sword away in the underworld with the help of a pretty priestess who kept turning down his advances. He told Mundus that he'd be back for his sword eventually and to hold it for him. Mundus was cool about it and kept it in his basement. After that ordeal and a stinging slap from the pretty priestess that helped him seal the door, Sparda settled down with a very pretty blonde human woman who, like the priestess didn't think much of Sparda, but _unlike_ the priestess didn't think she could do any better. They got married after Sparda drunkenly cried and threatened to kill himself and half the country outside her window and they had twins the following year.

This was told to an eight year old Dante and Vergil and their mother, Eva quickly shooed them away their drunken father and sent them to bed.

To this day Vergil wasn't sure if he could believe his father, but his mother neither confirmed nor denied his story. Still, the Sword of Sparda existed and it was known to have incredible power. Once he got his hands on it he could rule both the human and demon world and have all the apples in the—no, that wasn't right. Stupid apples, stupid father and his stupid drunken stories.

Vergil closed the book and shelved it somewhere random.

"You know, it'd be a shame to your father's legacy if everyone knew the true story."

Vergil flinched, turning around immediately, Yamato already pointing at the owner's voice. The clown dressed in a dark purple jumpsuit frowned and made his knees shake wildly.

"Don't shoot! I'm innocent!" He raised his hands, then laughed hysterically as he avoided Vergil's swipe of his blade. He jumped backwards when the young prince swung again and landed softly a few feet away, taking a bow.

The clown looked up, a large grin on his lips.

"Welcome! My name is Jester!"

Vergil brought his katana back, sheathing it. He scowled.

"Where's the wizard?" Vergil asked.

Jester smirked. "Wizard? There is no wizard here and you'd be a fool to believe in hearsay if you're here looking for one."

Enough was enough. Vergil mustered his demonic energy, creating small blue swords around himself in a belt. He sent the blades flying towards the clown, which impaled him on impact. Jester staggered, holding onto one of the blades sticking out of his body, blood trickling down his chin. Vergil smirked. The clown was the one who was a fool for testing Vergil's patience.

The clown slowly pulled a blue blade out, wincing in pain as it slid out of his flesh. Once out he began to work on another blade, but as his worked his body began to swell. The more he pulled the more he ballooned until he simply exploded into bits of colorful ribbon and shiny confetti.

The sound of wild clapping accompanied by laughter brought Vergil's attention to the top of a bookcase where the purple clown sat nice and safe.

"Bravo! Well done!"

Vergil's jaw hardened as he unsheathed Yamato and sent a bright white slash in the clown's direction. The bookcase slowly leaned forward before collapsing into another case in half.

The clown landed softly on his feet, leaning against the stone bookcase and shaking his head in a disapproving way.

"Temper, temper, devil boy."

Vergil's eyes widened at the nickname, which made Jester, smile.

"That's right, I know who you are," he said and suddenly he stood behind Vergil, his lips close enough to touch his earlobe. "Son of Sparda."

Vergil whipped around, katana ready, but Jester easily held the blade, sandwiched between his hands.

"I expected better," he said, before dissolving into laughter.

His maniacal laughter got on Vergil's nerves and the prince twisted his blade out from the clown's hands. He slashed at him, delivering an onslaught of attacks that no one, neither human or demon had any hopes of surviving, and yet the clown easily dodged them over and over. The bookcases fell around them, one by one, creating a cloud of dust. Cutting through the thick cloud, Vergil tried to attack Jester, impaling him once only to find him explode into a mess of confetti and colorful ribbons. The battle was infuriating and it didn't help that the clown kept laughing through it, mocking Vergil's scowl, pretending to be injured only to smile and laugh again before bursting into a cloud of confetti.

When the last case fell, Vergil stood still, sheathing his sword and trying his best to look composed and threatening despite being out of breath and tired. He waited for the dust to clear when Jester came rushing towards him, hands out, long claws drawn and dripping a black liquid. Vergil rushed forth; he wasn't going to let the clown intimidate him. They met in the middle; with Vergil delivering a devastating blow that he was sure no one could survive. The clown held his middle before dissolving into laughter and jumping back.

"That was a load of fun!"

Vergil turned around to spot the clown walking on the ceiling.

"Maybe next time," he said stopping to pose with his hands on his hips. "I'll actually break a sweat!"

Vergil grit his teeth, sending a slash at the clown only to have him easily dodge it with a flip.

"Later devil boy!" and the clown disappeared in a puff of confetti and laughter.

The demon prince stood there, his shoulders tense as his anger grew beyond the boiling point. He was played with and Vergil hated being treated like he was some mere toy. But he wasn't going to let a clown get in his way of defeating the wizard, Arkham. He was going to succeed and when all was said and done, he'll be the one having the last laugh.

With that in mind, Vergil turned to walk toward the library's exit when he saw a woman, dressed in a short corset dress, perched at the doorway carrying a large cross-bow. She shot a flaming arrow his way and Vergil didn't bother moving, knowing she was going to miss when he felt it zip past his face.

He raised an eyebrow. "You missed."

The woman smirked.

"Did I?"

A sudden explosion knocked Vergil forward. He dodged another arrow in time as the woman ran forward. She didn't waste time in her attack, kicking a foot up to make contact with his face, but Vergil veered to the left and missed her boot in time. He grabbed her arm, twisting it behind her and she groaned in pain.

"You are wasting my time, woman." He pushed her away from him hard enough to make her trip and fall to the ground. "You're nothing but—"

He didn't have time to see the arrow, only experiencing its piercing pain as it dug into his forehead. Vergil pulled it out, wincing as the wood slid out of his flesh. Obviously this woman wasn't your ordinary maiden, but that didn't mean Vergil wasn't going to strip the skin off her flesh.

"He was right, you are a demon," she said, already on her feet as she aimed her crossbow at him.

"And you are going to have the pleasure of becoming a dead woman," he replied, his hand on Yamato's grip.

"Come and get it, devil boy."

His eyes widened at her reply. Could she be the clown in disguise? There was only one way to find out as he lunged forward to take a swipe. She flipped backwards, staying low to throw out a sweeping kick. Vergil dodged it, quickly jumping to the side as he brought his sword down. She rolled away, getting on her feet and loading her crossbow with another arrow. She took her shot and Vergil easily spun his katana to deflect it. He swung Yamato, sending a blinding wave of light in her direction. The woman flipped upwards, high enough to avoid being cut. He was vaguely impressed at her speed but it stopped there. She was fast, but obviously not fast enough as he caught sight of the tear in her skirt. She saw it too and glared at him, loading up another arrow. In response, Vergil got ready, his grip on Yamato.

They stared at each other, daring the other to make the first move.

"Why are you here?" the woman asked, narrowing her gaze on him.

"That's none of your concern," Vergil replied.

"If it concerns the wizard, then it does."

"What is he to you woman?"

"Doesn't matter what he is to me, only that he's going to die by my hands."

Vergil smirked. "You? A human take on a powerful wizard? Your sense of humor is warped if you remain the butt of your own jokes."

"And I suppose a demon like you has a chance?"

"I'm the son of the Legendary Dark Knight," Vergil answered. "I'm sure I'm more than enough to defeat the wizard Arkham and once I absorb his power I will be strong enough to open the gates of hell and acquire the Sword of Sparda, with it I will rule both the human and demon worlds with as much—"

He stopped when he noticed the woman picking at the tear in her skirt. She must've felt his stare as she looked up at him.

"I'm sorry, you were talking?"

Vergil felt his brow twitch as his fingers gripped Yamato tightly.

"The chemistry between the two of you is simply electric!" Jester announced.

Both the woman and Vergil looked in his direction. The prince was ready for another round, but the woman beat him to it as she ran towards the clown, cross-bow ready. She swung at him and the clown, moving faster than the naked eye could catch was behind her, taking her arm and turning her around to face him. He drew her close, kicking her behind her left knee, forcing her to buckle backward as he held their pose.

"Shall we dance?"

Vergil took advantage of this, rushing forth to attack them from behind. The clown sensing danger quickly drew up and spun the woman around, throwing her into Vergil and sending them across the room. The wind left his lungs as his back made impact with the wall and it didn't help that he also broke the woman's fall. He shoved her aside, eyes dark and murderous as he got up to face the clown again.

"Really, you two are such a disappointment."

The woman, who already was on her feet, shot an army of arrows at the clown which he easily dodged, but gave her the opportunity to get close enough to attack. She threw her fist at him, which he caught.

"Really Mary, you'll attack your own flesh and blood?"

She delivered a swift hard kick to his head. The clown staggered, his usual mocking grin now an unamused frown and Vergil almost smirked at this because the bastard was annoying. Though she landed a hit, the clown made sure to pay her back double and his fist connected to her stomach, sending her flying some feet and into a wall where she laid coughing and groaning in pain. Vergil wasted no time, running forth, knowing he could finish the clown off when his blade clashed with Jester's long purple claws. Sparks flew as they fought, Jester meeting his blade with every slash, swipe, and thrust. The clown finally locked his hands on Yamato, his claws acting like a Venus flytrap as it tangled itself on the blade.

Jester pulled the sword close, which made Vergil bend forward against his will.

"Ordinarily I'd be chopped to fine ribbons if you were up to your full potential," the clown said, which made Vergil glare. "But even I know you must've had a long journey to get here. It's left you weak and vulnerable if you're coming here on a mere rumor is to believed."

Vergil tried to free Yamato's grasps but it was useless. It was either he let the sword go or stay stuck.

"Something's off with you, Vergil, I wonder what it could be," he whispered and the prince suppressed a shudder and tried his best to appear menacing.

"Could it be that you lack power?" the clown grinned. "Or maybe you lack confidence?" he leaned forward, their lips almost touching.

"Or maybe, you're more human than you believe, hm?"

Repulsed by him Vergil pulled his head back and in that instance Jester let him go.

The clown instantly transformed into another man, a bald man with a pulsating growth on the side his face.

"I know why you're here and you're no match for me, the great wizard, Arkham."

He began to walk towards Vergil and the tower began to rumble and shake.

"The Sword of Sparda will be mine and mines alone and with it, I'll be the one to rule over both the demon world and the human world. It takes might and control, both of which you know nothing of young Sparda. The sword will be wasted on such incompetent youth."

"You watch your tongue." Vergil stood up, albeit shakily as the room around them was beginning to fall apart.

"Or what? You are an underwhelming clone of your father. I have nothing to truly fear." The man walked slow and steady as though the crumpling tower had no effect on his body.

"Then you are a fool!" Vergil was not one to be outdone in the monologue department. No one out monologued him! Nobody!

"Your delusions will lead you straight to your downfall. I have control and might and with them I will gain power. As the true son of Sparda I will rise above you and destroy your existence. I will rule over the demon and human worlds, I will unleash total chaos and destruction for it is my fate and destiny to obliterate anything in sight that doesn't conform to my beliefs!"

"Well then, son of Sparda, you will find that—"

"Oh for the love of—shut up!" the woman yelled, not fond of their monologue-off.

The tower wasn't going to hold up its shape for long with walls falling in and rocks falling from the sky. Arkham quickly turned into his Jester form, laughing as he dodged rocks and pieces of structure with ease.

"See you very soon, devil boy!" he laughed, waving goodbye.

Vergil vowed that he was going to kill Arkham twice, once in his clown form and again in his human? Wizard? Vergil wasn't sure what that man was, but he was positive something as ugly as Arkham didn't have a form that didn't make someone simultaneously throw up in disgust and scream in horror.

"Hey! Get of out the way!"

Vergil had a few choice snarky words for the woman too, who was as annoying, and when he turned, ignoring her command because he'd be damned to follow her orders seeing as she was a filthy human, he was hit by a large rock before he could get any zingers out.

Oh well, he thought as darkness overtook him.

Not like she could understand the sophistication of his jokes because her head was probably full with as much hot air as those inflatable balloons on her chest.

He smirked.

Damn.

That was a good one.

And Vergil blacked out.


	3. Chapter 3

3.

Vergil had always been an unusual child. Unlike his brother, Vergil didn't take pleasure in running around with the other children playing games, or getting into mischief by playing tricks on adults. He much preferred to stay home, helping his mother do chores and studying from the sea of books they had in their library. He wasn't charismatic or funny like his younger brother, so he didn't make friends easily. In fact, he always felt awkward when talking to others, especially if they'd taken a liking to him as he was always cautious of their intentions. This was because of their demon heritage which made them seem as both exotic and taboo. Being of mixed blood between human and demon, the boys were subject to much discrimination and curiosity from both sides. Dante didn't let this get to him, he used his charisma and sense of humor to endear himself to humans while using his quick snark and all around bad boy attitude to endear himself to demons as the lovable trickster who could still hold his own against them.

Vergil had a harder time endearing himself to either side. He wasn't funny and he was painfully shy. He didn't try venturing out since he didn't like anyone outside his immediate family. Humans found him cold and unpleasant, demons found him okay, but given the choice between a conversation with Vergil and watching paint dry, they chose the paint because at least that guaranteed witty banter in the form of paint bubbles popping. So Vergil stopped trying to appeal to either side and focused on himself. He gave himself a role and being the oldest by five minutes, declared himself the older brother. Who was going to save Dante was his own dumbassery when people turned on them? Vergil of course. Soon the older brother role ran its course when Dante grew strong enough to defend himself and didn't think it was cool when his friends turned up missing or dead. This left Vergil feeling empty and alone. He didn't have friends like Dante and his brother was all he had when they weren't driving their mother crazy with their petty squabbles.

"Leave me alone!"

"Moooom, tell Vergil he likes chocolate!"

"Mother!"

"Tell him he likes it!"

But that all soon changed when their parents fell victim to a demon attack while off on one of their missions. The twins, devastated, thew themselves into their own constructed little worlds to deal with their grief. Dante grew resentful of demons, ashamed that the same blood coursed through his veins, and became a demon hunter as a result. He vowed to use his demonic powers to protect humans, given that their checks didn't bounce. Vergil went the opposite route and became obsessed with his demonhood. He embraced his demonic power, using it to get closer to surpassing Sparda. He knew he could achieve greater power and become the demon lord his father should've been and not the one currently rotting in an unmarked grave somewhere.

Power.

He needed more of it. He couldn't rise to his full potential on his own without it. With power he would be able to overcome the want of friends, the need of affection and the feelings of emptiness. With power he wouldn't have to worry about losing anything again. With power, he would be perfect.

Vergil stirred in his sleep, groaning slightly at the soreness of his body. He wasn't dead, but from how terrible he felt he guessed he sustained some serious injuries. The last thing he remembered was the tower collapsing in on itself before getting a last glimpse of that woman.

Speaking of, he hoped she died a long agonizing death as rocks fell on her.

Vergil finally opened his eyes.

"Good. You're awake."

That voice! Vergil's eyes narrowed and he made an attempt at sitting up, but stopped when a wave of pain crashed into him. He wasn't going to show her any weakness. He swallowed a grimace as he tried sitting up more slowly.

So the woman from the tower was still alive? Vergil attributed that to luck. He watched her rise up from the other side of the cave they were in and he wondered how exactly he got to being there. In fact, as he began to look around, where was he? There was a small fire in the middle, making the wood crackle and pop occasionally. His immediately noticed the bandages around his chest, his amulet, vest, and coat were gone— or rather, folded at the foot of the slab of rock he was sleeping on. Yamato lay beside him and as he watched her approach, he made sure to bring it close to him.

"How do you feel?" The woman stood in front of him, leaning down to brush some of his bangs. He turned his head, scooting backwards on the rock away from her.

"I'm fine," he assured her. The woman said nothing, going back to the other side of the cave.

Vergil went to work removing his soiled bandages. Once off, they revealed skin barren of any marks or bruises. This was a result of being a half breed. His demonic blood accelerated his metabolism resulting in excellent healing, but at a price. Being half demon meant his healing ability took time and energy. The soreness he felt was an effect of his body going into healing overdrive, and this left him feeling tired and weak.

The woman returned with something in hand. As she drew close, he spotted a vial filled with a green liquid. She came and knelt in front of him and that was when he noticed, as she looked up and offered him the vial, that her eyes were different from each other, much like the clown's, one red and one blue. He wondered what connection she and Arkham had to each other before his eyes traveled down to the light scar across the bridge of her nose and her pink full lips. He quickly snapped out of it, reminding himself that he shouldn't be curious, especially when it came to a human like her.

"Drink this, it'll make you better."

Vergil looked at the vial.

"No."

The woman pouted. "Drink it. It's not poisoned."

"How do I know it isn't poisoned?" he challenged her and he saw her face twitch with a hint of annoyance.

"Because if I wanted you dead, I would've killed you when the tower collapsed instead of dragging your sorry excuse of a corpse to safety."

They glared heatedly at each other. Vergil snatched the vial from her and examined it before taking an experimental sniff. It smelled sweet and he detected something herbal in the background.

"What is this?"

"It's a potion."

"You're a witch?"

"No. I'm not." Her faced looked hard, as though she took offense. "I just know my potions very well."

"Says the witch," Vergil scoffed.

"Believe what you want. I'm not here to impress you."

The woman stood and crossed her arms over her chest. She looked utterly ridiculous with that short corset gown. She was practically parading around in her underwear with how much leg she was showing. She looked like a complete harlot and it wouldn't surprise him if she were a woman of very little to no moral value. A common wench was what he saw in front of him.

"So, are you going to drink up or do you want me to spoon feed it to you?"

The question jarred him out of his mental scrutiny of her enough to get the quip at his expense. He brought the vial close to him, glaring at her.

"Of course not," he said, bringing the rim to his lips.

He opened his mouth and tilted the bottle, letting the thick liquid wash down his throat. It tasted exactly like it smelt, sickly sweet with of an herbal taste in the background. He immediately began to feel the medicine's effects as every cell in his body rejuvenated. The soreness he once felt was gone and he felt alert. He licked his lips, the faint taste of the liquid still sweet on his tongue, and looked at the woman, who smirked. What did she find so amusing? He gave her a once over, making sure not to hide the look of disgust when he did so.

"You are indecent."

The woman raised an eyebrow, abandoning her previous stance as she placed a hand on her hip, bending her knee slightly so it dropped.

"You weren't complaining about it before," she said, and he turned his nose up to her because really, she was beneath him.

"In the heat of battle, nothing fazes me."

The woman smirked again and knelt quickly. His eyes widened in horror as she forced his knees apart. Every cell in his brain screamed at him to kill her right then and there, but as it was, Vergil's eyes stayed glued to her cleavage as she slowly rose up and plucked the vial out of his hand. In a split second she was back to standing in front of him, dangling the empty vial for him to see with a cocksure smirk.

"You're welcome," she winked.

Vergil immediately closed his legs and glared at the floor because he didn't trust himself to stand up and kill her right then and there because he sure his legs felt like jelly. The heat of embarrassment travel from his ears down the line of his jaw. He felt the skin on the back of his neck tingle and he wondered if he were being bewitched by that infernal woman.

Well, he wasn't going to sit there and be made a fool by her. Vergil stood and got his things, getting dressed quickly. The sooner he was out of there, the better since he needed to track Arkham down before the wizard reached Hell's gate.

"You're going to go after him?" the woman asked. "In your condition?"

"I'm fine," he replied, checking Yamato before sheathing it.

"What makes you think you can take him down?"

Vergil looked up at her. It was an idiotic question. "I am a son of Sparda. He was never a match for me."

The woman raised an eyebrow at his claim.

"I seem to remember you getting your ass handed to you."

"Like you're one to talk," he snapped immediately after. He had no time for this and he went to leave. He needed to get out of there and get to the gate.

"And yet I'm not chasing after my father half-assedly because he beat me."

Vergil stopped at the cave's entrance and turned around.

"He's your father?"

The woman nodded, going to sit on the slab Vergil once occupied.

"He kept me trapped in that tower since I was a child," she said, "Though once he became obsessed with demonic power, he turned a blind eye to my imprisonment."

Vergil was still stuck on one bit of information.

"_You're _the maiden?"

The woman narrowed her gaze, her annoyance clearly visible.

"Yes, I am," she replied in a clipped tone.

Weren't maidens feminine and pure? She was anything but with the way she carried herself. A short white and green corset dress, hunter's boots, and a crossbow were not things normal maidens wore or carried. Yet, this woman, because she was far from a girl given her curvy body and ample breasts, claimed to be a soft, innocent, vulnerable girl?

"Delusional," Vergil found himself saying out loud.

"Excuse me?"

"You are _not _a maiden. You're—"

"I _am _a maiden of only nineteen," the woman said, turning her nose up at Vergil.

The demon prince was silent.

"You are not nineteen," he deadpanned.

The woman glared at him. "_Fine_. I'm twenty-five, but I'm not going any higher."

Vergil raised an eyebrow because even twenty-five seemed a bit of a stretch. She was closer to pushing thirty and he was just about to voice that when she cut him off.

"You know, I'm sick of the maiden stereotype. Just because I'm not your typical twenty-eig—_five_, _twenty-five_ year old woman—"

Vergil rolled his eyes.

"—doesn't mean I'm not any less feminine. I can be as soft and dainty as the next girl, but I won't become some air head waiting for some dork on a horse to rescue me. I'm smart and perfectly capable of defending myself without losing my femininity thank you very much."

"You seem to boast plenty about your combat skills despite remaining in that tower."

"You're not the only one who wants my father dead," she replied. She looked down at the small pendant on her necklace. "I hate him too. He has to pay for what he's done."

Vergil couldn't be bothered. He wasn't interested in neither her feelings nor her motivations.

"Then you are out of luck. I'm going to defeat him and when I do, I will absorb his power and use it to open the gates to the demon world myself. I will get my father's sword, and with it, I will rule both worlds. I will achieve true greatness."

There was silence.

The woman blinked at him.

"So…you're not going to give me an evil laugh? You make a terrible villain."

Vergil's shoulders tensed as he controlled the urge to kill her. No. He wouldn't do it because her blood would stain his precious katana and he refused to have that happen.

"I'm wasting my time with you, woman."

"My name is not woman," she said standing and walking towards him. "But you can call me Lady."

"Your name does not interest me," he spat. "You are human and therefore beneath me. As far as we're concerned, we have nothing to do with each other."

Lady glared. "Fine," she said, turning around sharply and going over to her bag near the fire.

"I would never team up with the likes of you anyway. You're just another demon on my 'shit to do' list. We'll see who gets to my father first."

Vergil couldn't help but smirk at her childishness. "You are a foolish woman."

"And you." She rose up and looked at his pants. "Are a foolish boy with his zipper down."

Vergil looked down and his jaw dropped mortified.


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N:** Just wanted to answer a question left by one review. Lady is indeed older. I'm writing her character from DMC4, which makes her around 28 or so. I usually like writing her older. It gives me more room to play with her character. And yes, she was lying about her age. She's in denial of it which is a running joke in this story.

* * *

4.

Walking through another threshold, Vergil found himself at the same water fountain he'd seen earlier when he took a left instead of a right down the bushy corridor. It was then he realized something.

He was lost.

Since leaving the cave, Vergil came upon a labyrinth. There was no way of going around it as it was wide enough to cut off any such ideas. There was only one entrance with a plaque that read: Labyrinth of Woe. In smaller print below it read: Only the smart need apply. And below that read: Warning – Sucks to be you if you have allergies. Vergil scoffed at the sign and entered anyway because unlike others he was incredibly smart and his sinuses never gave him any issues during the spring.

That was four hours ago and it was starting to get dark. He stopped when he saw the same water fountain again. This was getting ridiculous, but what could he do? He could slice his way through the shrubbery and be done with it. The thought had crossed his mind before when he first entered the labyrinth, but he figured he'd be out of it before he needed to result to such drastic measures. He looked at the tall, thick hedges and unsheathed Yamato. Well, he might as well try it and get out of there. He executed a couple of simple swipes, his blade slicing through the thick greenery with ease and watched the branches and leaves fall. The fact that it fell so easy was promising and he went to work, hacking and slashing his way through.

ten minutes had gone by and Vergil was in the thick of it, tunneling his way, surrounded by shrubbery. Honestly? How much more would he have to hack before reaching a clearing? He was already drawing up a sweat as the branches became harder and harder to cut. He hit a snag when he went to swing and found his wrist entangled by some vine. It was then that he heard it, the shrubbery growing from behind. He couldn't move as the vines kept him in place. Soon the live plants were on his back, pushing him through the thick leaves and he had to close his eyes and mouth to prevent twigs and leaves from entering. He felt the slight sting of branches cutting his face and when he finally found the strength to break Yamato free, Vergil fell out into a clearing. He stood up, coughing and panting for air, watching as the hedge that expelled him outwards return to normal.

Vergil turned around and saw that he was right back where he started.

He pulled the twigs and leaves out of his hair, shaking out any bugs and quickly slicked it up with some water from the fountain nearby. There was no way in hell he was leaving this place without his hair perfectly coiffed. Still, with how the labyrinth came alive, it seemed the maze didn't want him leaving at all. There was magic in the works there, but what could he do to dispel it? Was there some ritual he had to do? Did he need magic? Or was this all an elaborate prank?

His mind went back to the woman, the one that saved him. She was the daughter of the wizard; surely she had some magical abilities despite her earlier denial. Could she be the force behind him being trapped there? What would she gain from his being there? He pictured her amused grin and scowled. Obviously, she'd gain amusement for one, but if she wanted to amuse herself at his expense, he'd picture her not doing an elaborate scheme because really, she was human and probably not very smart. So this left him to suspect Arkham. The wizard managed to pull one over him as the Jester and Vergil wondered if the purple clown was in control of this maze.

Vergil gripped his katana, shoulders tensing. Everything around him was suddenly silent, even the water from the fountain stopped pouring.

Something was coming. He closed his eyes and concentrated. The demonic energy of whatever it was, was getting closer. It felt raw, uncontrolled, and that was when he knew whatever was coming wasn't just powerful, it was also hungry. Hungry for _what _was what Vergil was going to find out since a demon didn't throw out its energy like that unless it was either hunting to feed or in heat.

The dark prince swallowed thickly and opened his eyes, thinking of the latter. He was _not_ going to be anyone's demonic mate. He dug his heals into the ground and waited for the beast to show.

* * *

Lady took a deep breath, eyes narrowing as she concentrated on her prey. The deer hardly knew she was there as it chewed on the thick grass happily. She pulled her arrow back and took a shot, hitting the ground next to the young doe, causing it to run away. She sucked her teeth. There went dinner. That was the third meal she let get away with her clumsy shooting and she couldn't understand why. She was an excellent hunter and animals weren't as vicious as demons, so she shouldn't have had any problems putting one down.

She decided to go check on her snares. Maybe she got something there? When she found them, she frowned. Every single trap was loose. What was wrong with her today?

As she knelt to make her traps again, her thoughts went back to the cave and the demon she healed there. She didn't _have _to save him and yet she did. She didn't care if he was one of the sons of the legendary dark knight. He was just another demon on her hit list. And yet, she dragged his unconscious form back to the cave and healed him. She couldn't explain this course of action to herself. Maybe she pitied him? Or maybe she didn't want to feel guilt for leaving him behind when she knew she could save him.

She sighed. Her good deed didn't prove much since the guy proved to be an ungrateful egotistical prick. And he didn't really endear himself to her since he shared her father's blood thirst for power. She should've let him die under all that rubble. But she didn't and now she had to deal with _two_ melodramatic egotistical maniacs that loved to monologue about how evil and powerful they were going to become. Good job Lady; make your job that much _harder_.

She fixed the last snare and tested it. Seeing it act accordingly, she stood and dusted her hands. The other traps should work just like it. Now to try to actually hunt and not think about the fact that she let _another _homicidal maniac determined to open the demon floodgates into the wild.

Letting her guilt roll over her shoulders, the demon hunter went back to skimming the land for animals. As she drew deeper into the woods she noticed the grass and leaves were getting thicker and greener than usual. She knew immediately she was near the Labyrinth her father built and knowing how magically charged it was, she knew she would find no game there.

She stopped at the hedge and decided to turn around when the sound of a hiss from behind her kept her still. She slowly turned around.

"What are you doing here?" she asked, raising an eyebrow.

It aimed its poisonous thorns her way and shrieked.

* * *

Vergil gave one last swipe to a set of the winged creatures before cleaning his sword of their blood. These demons, insects—from their scaly legs and small stature—hissed as their hind wings vibrated. Their violet eyes glowed as they charged up an attack. Vergil dodged their sharp thorns easily, and rushed forth to take the rest of the pack down. Slicing through their bodies was easy and he expected more from a menacing looking enemy. But Vergil knew that the demonic energy he sensed before didn't belong to them. It belonged to something much, _much _larger. These demon insects were nothing but children and as he slaughtered the last of the pack, Vergil felt the ground shake.

He smirked as the demonic energy flushed in like a tidal wave. The hedges rolled down, vines and branches grew apart to make room for the real foe the prince should've been facing. The large green creature snaked its way down, its mouth opening to show red flesh and spiny teeth. What was it? A dragon? A snake? A hybrid of both?

Vergil got ready, getting into his stance as he gripped Yamato.

From the red flesh came a figure with a torso of a woman. The woman, with red leaf like petals on her neck, had ghost white eyes and blood-red lips. Her hair looked like the ends of a snake's tongue, long thin and red as it split from her head. The woman looked down at the demons Vergil managed to slaughter.

"My children!"

She lowered her body slowly to the ground to look at their corpses. Her pale green hands touched their faces, long fingers gingerly closing their eyes as her bottom lip trembled. Vergil gripped his sword tightly, ready for anything if she went into hysterics. But the demon woman only looked up from the ground.

"You slaughtered my young. Why?"

Vergil squeezed Yamato's grip.

"What does it matter? They're dead," he replied.

The woman's eyes narrowed at him.

"They were my babies," she said, her voice hoarse with grief. Vergil didn't care.

"They were annoying and weak," he replied coolly.

The demon growled.

"How dare you!" She rose up, towering over Vergil before rushing down. The dark prince hardly moved, knowing he was in no danger. The serpent woman stopped when she felt his demonic energy.

"You're a demon."

Vergil smirked, unsheathing Yamato. It was time to dismiss this jungle beast. But the demon wasn't paying attention, as she was more interested in something else as she circled him, examining him.

"You're very cute," she said, licking her lips. Vergil's eyes widened. She circled him one more time and before Vergil could realize it, he found she had firmly coiled around him.

"I'm Echidna, though many know me by my nickname, She-Viper," she said, tracing his jaw line with her forefinger. "What's your name handsome?"

Vergil swallowed. He knew he was in a dire predicament going by the look of complete lust she in her eyes. She licked her lips seductively, waiting for his reply and Vergil couldn't help but feel his pulse quicken. He tried to regain control over himself. He was going to defeat her damn it! He wasn't going to fall for her creeper molester charm!

"Release me. I am a son of Sparda and—"

"A son of Sparda!" she repeated excited. "I've always wanted to mate with Sparda though he never called after that one time!" Her thumb brushed his lips.

"Sparda was handsome, but you're quite the looker yourself. We shall mate _violently_ and spawn an army of children."

Vergil's eyes widened in horror. So much for using his father's name to induce fear and intimidation. This was not going as planned and he wiggled his arms, struggling to get free.

"Let me go," he grunted, trying to slip his way under, but he found he couldn't move anywhere. "I wish not to father any of your-erm, young."

Echidna leaned in, tracing the crook of his neck with a fine nail as she made herself comfortable pressing her body against his trapped form.

"Are you fertile?"

"Ye—no, I mean—"

"Then what's the problem?" She asked and placed a trail of kisses up his neck to meet his ear. She bit down on his ear lobe and this sent an involuntary shiver down Vergil's spine. "Never been with a woman before?"

The question made his ears hot and he locked his jaw, swallowing to not only remain control of his demonic hormones, but keep his temper in check. His body was reacting to her touches against his will and he felt disgusted with himself for showing such weakness. He was above all that and he refused to fall victim to a demon woman's whims.

His eyes widened when he felt something slither by his pants.

"Get your hands away from me," he warned, not caring if the heat on his cheeks showed in the form of a blush.

"Those aren't my hands," she whispered huskily in his ear.

Vergil's eyes widened.

_'Silently screaming right now_' , was his only thought as his mouth opened in horror.

"Is this your first time?" she asked softly.

_**Ziiiiiip.**_

Her hand slithered down his bare chest and Vergil suddenly felt like crying.

"Don't worry, I know what I'm doing.

"_I am so uncomfortable right now_," he said, it sounded so rushed it sounded like all one big word.

The serpent woman leered.

"Trust me when I say that feeling will pass."

Vergil devil triggered, the force of his transformation causing Echidna to uncoil as it burned her. He wasted no time as the serpent woman coward back, nursing her face from the blast. Vergil grabbed Yamato and ran.


	5. Chapter 5

5.

Lady dispatched the last of the demon pack and plucked out her arrows for cleaning. It seemed Echidna was busy trying to get laid again if her young were out and about hunting. She felt sorry for the poor sap trapped in the maze with her. Once the serpent woman declared her new baby's daddy, it was best to stay far away since things tended to get bloody. Lady got the last of her arrows and began to walk the length of the hedge, looking to see where exactly Echidna's children came from.

She spotted the hole in the shrubbery and pouted. She might as well go in and eliminate any stragglers. It wouldn't do if more escaped and wreaked havoc in the forest. Echidna really needed to keep tabs on her kids, especially when it came to feeding them. A pack alone could wipe out a forest in a week; imagine if they made their hungry way into human towns? With this in mind, Lady crawled through, wincing as twigs and leaves snared in her hair. Once inside the labyrinth, she cleaned herself up and looked around.

The ground shook and that was enough to let Lady know that Echidna's prey was on the run. The hole from the hedge behind her closed up. Great, now she was trapped until the demon got laid. She hoped whoever the serpent woman was chasing would trip, fall down ass up and get plowed to death already.

Lady rounded a corner and that's when she saw him. A demon surrounded by a blue electric sparks heading straight for her. Before she could get her an arrow drawn, the demon slammed into her and the couple fell to the ground in a mess of limbs. The force from being knocked down had robbed her lungs of air and the demon hunter rolled over, coughing. The demon looked confused as it tried to get on his feet and when his energy flashed again, she saw a flicker of his true identity.

"It's you!" she said,looking at Vergil. He kept looking over his shoulder and that's when she knew lover boy was playing tag and he was _it_.

The ground shook again, shifting the hedges as Echidna rolled in.

"There you are! I have some mead on ice," she said, licking her lips.

She watched the demon's eyes widen and before he could think about getting away, Lady grabbed his clawed hand to keep him from escaping.

"Sorry, he's mine."

Vergil flickered and returned to his human form, looking at Lady in shock.

Lady stood up straight, trying her best to seem confident. She was playing with fire in this situation. She knew better than to get in between Echidna and her boy toys. The serpent woman narrowed her gaze, slithering toward Lady.

"He's yours?" she asked, coiling around the couple.

"Of course," Lady replied coolly. She was surprised Vergil hadn't said anything to contradict her claims.

"Since when?" the demon woman asked slithering past them to stand in front of them.

"Erm—since forever ago?"

"What are you doing?" Vergil whispered close to her ear.

"Look at your life right now. Look at your choices. Would you rather mate with her and die in the process? Or be my pretend lover and live with your pelvis intact?" she whispered back.

Vergil let go of her hand and wrapped an arm around her waist, pulling her close.

"This human is my mate," he said with a curt nod. Lady didn't bother suppressing her eye roll.

Echidna examined the couple, crossing her arms over her chest.

"If that is true," she said, not hiding the suspicion in her voice. "Kiss."

Lady and Vergil looked at each other. They _would _have to kiss just to prove their fake relationship. Lady regretted ever coming to the labyrinth.

She liked her lips and watched him do that same.

"I'm going to kiss you now," she said to him and he nodded.

"Very well. I shall enjoy your kiss and return it."

Right. Good. They leaned in, eyes staring and before their lips could meet their noses did, bumping roughly into each other. She flinched backwards, rubbing her nose from the pain.

"What are you? A virgin?" she complained. Vergil wasn't pleased either as he rubbed his nose.

"Excuse me?" Lady noticed the faint tinge of pink on the surface of his cheeks.

Echidna cleared her throat loudly and the couple composed themselves. Vergil grabbed Lady, making sure to glare at her when he brought her close. The demon hunter let him take the lead and she watched him swallow nervously as though gathering courage. She had half a mind of just locking their lips together and getting it over with. But she could tell he was having a hard time as she noted the beads of sweat on his forehead and lack of eye contact.

As he leaned in she leaned back. On the second thought, maybe they shouldn't. She had a rule about not dating demons because, you know, they were _demons _and who in their right mind would date one? She wasn't so confident now that his lips were barely hovering over hers and even though he was a demon and she disliked his overall personality, up close like this, she couldn't help but notice how different he looked. How handsome he actually was without that sour scowl that usually marred his features. His eyes were an intense electric blue that held her no matter how hard she tried to look away. As he closed his eyes, she closed hers, and waited for his kiss.

"Will you stop moving?" he grunted as she unknowingly leaned back. He closed the distance between them and Lady, being the suave woman that she normally was when a cute guy was going to kiss her, misjudged their distance and leaned up, his lips catching her eye in the process.

"Ow! My eye!"

"LIARS!" The earth shook around them.

Well that did not end well.

The couple broke apart when Echidna lashed her tail, each dodging to opposite sides. Vergil unsheathed Yamato while Lady loaded an arrow. Echidna rushed toward Lady, baring her fangs as she roared. The demon hunter shot an arrow at Echidna's chest. The demon serpent screamed, stopping to pull the arrow out. Vergil came from behind, bringing his katana down on the demon's arm, severing it. Echidna shrieked, grabbing her wound as it gushed blood. She whipped her tail out, lashing it out in every direction possible.

Lady dodged the onslaught of attacks until she snagged her foot on a vine. The demon hunter went down. This was not good. She tried pulling her foot and worked frantically at ripping the vine off. But the more she ripped, the tighter the vine's grip became and soon it wrapped its way up her leg. She felt the sharp wind of Echidna's tail and looked up to see that Vergil was keeping her busy. Regardless of Vergil's battle with the demon, Lady had to work herself out of this bind. If not, then she was going to get killed by being in their way. She twisted and pulled some of the vine off before it traveled up any further.

Vergil had Echidna where he wanted her, weak and almost defenseless. Her rage made her clumsy and reckless. He could easily end her life but just because she was weak didn't mean she wasn't trouble. In her weakened state, her demonic power multiplied ten fold, a response to her life being in danger much like the flush of adrenaline humans experience in similar situations. Her tail proved to be the most troublesome as it lashed out recklessly with no real pattern to follow. She was desperate and Vergil played on that as he landed quick slashes before dodging back.

He spotted Lady in the distance. She was trying to free her leg from something and he watched her freeze when Enchidna's tail came a little too close for comfort. He could very well leave her to suffer on that end and take care of Echidna. But before he knew it, he felt himself move and he was suddenly at her side, slashing Yamato through the stubborn vine.

"Thanks," she said, but he turned his back to her, not caring for the gratitude. He guessed he owed her for what she did for him in the cave.

Echidna rushed toward them, glowing in such a rage, green electricity crisped the plant life around her.

"You got to be kidding me," Lady said. She pulled on Vergil's arm. "Let's go."

"Where are we going? I can finish her," he said, shaking her off.

"Just trust me," was all she said before she took off in a run.

Vergil followed right behind with Echidna in hot pursuit. He couldn't understand why he was running with this woman. The dark prince never ran from battle and he suddenly felt foolish for following Lady.

She stopped suddenly.

"What are you—"

He stopped to look up at what she was seeing. His jaw dropped. The moon? The giant globe rolled forth, it's blue and red eyes ablaze as it smiled. Even Echidna stopped when she reached them and gawked.

"Oh you are not serious," Vergil said, but Lady ignored him as she dragged him.

"Run!"

The globe rolled forth, hysterically laughing as it crushed the maze's walls mercilessly. Echidna took off , slithering past the couple as she tried to avoid being crushed. The moon demon kept rolling and laughing, chasing them down. Lady maneuvered them through, turning so many corners that Vergil wondered if she wasn't getting them more lost. The giant demon was hot in pursuit, hysterically laughing. Things were all right for a moment, as they ran for their lives, until the demon decided to bounce. Lady and Vergil could barely keep a straight run, struggling to stay upright with each earth shaking pound.

The couple dragged their way down another corridor when they finally spotted the exit. He grabbed the woman, throwing her over his shoulder again and broke into a sprint. The moon demon rolled behind them and Vergil jumped though the threshold of the labyrinth's exit. The couple landed on the other side. The moon demon laughed, rolling on by, ignoring the exit.

The couple stared as the demon's bright light grew dimmer as it rolled deeper into the labyrinth.

"You knew your way out," he said, standing up.

"Yes. My father built the labyrinth to keep outsiders away," Lady replied.

"And the viper demon?"

"One of the first he learned to summon. She lives in there, to take care of any intruders that dare go inside by mating with them to death."

Vergil made a face. Ew.

"You're welcome you know," she said next, smirking at him. He threw an icy glare at her, looking her over as if she were stupid.

"For what exactly?" he pointed to the plaque he came upon when he first met the labyrinth. "I'm right back to the beginning."

"For getting you out in general," she spat, glaring at him in return. She crossed her arms over her chest. "And if I remember correctly, I saved you from being viciously made love to. I deserve a thank you for being your walking chastity belt, virgin boy."

"I am _not _a virgin," Vergil growled, his cheeks hot with a mixture of embarrassment and rage.

"Is that so?" she asked, amused at his reaction. "You look like you can't screw your way out of a_ labyrinth_, let alone know what to do with a woman."

"_How dare you_! The business of what happens in my bed is no one's business but my own. And besides, I am a son of Sparda and I am above cardinal pleasures of the flesh."

Lady stared at him in silence.

"You must be horny…like, _all _the time."

Before Vergil could unsheathed his katana to behead her, an explosion from inside of the labyrinth erupted. Colorful ribbons and confetti rained down upon them.

"What was that?" he asked as he watched Lady pick out confetti from her hair.

"Looks like the demon reached the middle. It always explodes when it does."

She counted her arrows, but her bow was at a loss, as it appeared to be broken.

"Listen, it's dark and late. Why don't you come back with me to the cave?"

"For what? So you can continue to mock me?" He turned away from her as he scowled.

"I promise I won't make fun of you anymore for the night." He felt her draw near. "Look, you don't have to come with me. But I think after today you deserve a hot meal and a place to stay."

Vergil heard her step back and walk away. He didn't have to go with her. She was nothing but trouble. But then again, she had her uses. If it wasn't for her he wouldn't be standing, and yet because of her, he was almost raped by one demon and crushed by another. He sighed. Might as well take her up on her offer for now seeing as he had nowhere else to go. In the morning he promised to leave before sunrise and avoid the labyrinth.

Vergil took off in the direction she went in and went to catch up.


End file.
